


Hypnotize

by conceptofzero



Category: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
Genre: Hypnotism, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-22
Updated: 2012-01-22
Packaged: 2017-10-29 22:35:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/324918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptofzero/pseuds/conceptofzero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pickle Inspector attempts to help Problem Sleuth relax with a little knowledge he's picked up from one of his cases. But this is Midnight City and nothing ever goes the way it should.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hypnotize

The thing about being one of less than a dozen human beings in a city of aliens is that you end up staying close to your own kind. It’s not a racist thing, it’s a belonging thing. When he goes out into the city, he always gets stares here and there from those strange black and white chess piece people. They’re not unfriendly, they just find him to be an oddity, and there are always awkward moments when people touch first without asking permission, prodding his skin with their sharp fingers and tugging at loose flys of hair, or asking him what’s wrong with his eyes.

So, when he wants to be normal, to be utterly perfectly ordinary, he ends up turning to the company of the few other humans who ended up in this place. The trouble is that even those people who should make him feel normal tend to... well... do quite the opposite.

Sleuth’s been slouching in his spare chair for more than an hour now, rambling on about his troubles (and Sleuth has certainly lived up to his name, or at least, the first half of it). PI welcomes him at first, but after about the third story involving PS being rude, arrogant and winning despite the fact that he clearly didn’t deserve it, PI is more than a little fed up.

Before Sleuth can launch into another story, he quickly takes advantage of the momentary silence to get his own concerns in. “So, you’re feeling stressed? And that’s why you came here?”

“Yeah. I figured if anybody knows a way to relax, it would be you. You’re always wound tighter than a cheap watch in a washing machine.” Sleuth puts his feet up on PI’s desk, completely the trifecta of annoyance he’s clearly gambling on. PI’s mouth twitches ever so slightly, nearly frowning, and he pushes Sleuth’s feet off his desk with a mostly used pen, doing his best not to let the mixed metaphor or the blatant disrespect get to him.

“I know a few ways to relax. Reading has always worked wonders for me. Or perhaps a pot of tea to be enjoyed by yourself, with no distractions. Oh, yes, I’m quite fond of long, hot showers. They can work the knots out of your back quite nicely.” He does not bother to mention baths. He knows exactly the sort of joke Sleuth will make about hot baths. “Or perhaps breathing exercises-”

“That all needs a lot of time. Maybe your caseload is light enough that you can spend hours sitting around in a tub with a frou-frou mask on your face-”

“Excuse me!”

“-but I’m a busy guy. I’ve got crimes to solve and bad guys to pump full of lead. Don’t you have anything quicker?” PS snaps his fingers, pretending to think. It’s obvious he already has an answer in mind, and he finally comes up with it. “Hey, what about hypnotism? You did that for Ace Dick.”

PI sighs, “That was... oh. Actually, that might be quite useful.” It had worked rather well when he tried it out on Ace Dick, who had spent the rest of the evening clucking like a chicken when anyone said the word gentleman, right up until the moment where AD threatened to introduce PI’s nose to the back of his skull if he didn’t undo it. As far as knowledge learned while working cases went, hypnotism had turned out to be a fascinating but mostly useless trick, until now. “Well, I suppose we could give it a try.”

“That’s the spirit, Pickle. Go on and fetch that book so we can get rolling.” Sleuth’s grin makes it clear that he knows exactly what PI is about to say to him.

“I’ve asked you before not to call me Pickle. It’s disrespectful, and I don’t appreciate it one bit.” PI hates that everyone thinks they’re very clever to use Pickle as a stealthy insult against PI. They’re not clever, and dozens of elementary children have already beat them to the punch ages ago. “You wouldn’t appreciate it very much if I called you Problem.”

“Nah, that’s what Hysterical Dame calls me when she’s mad.” He stretches out, giving PI that rather unsettling grin of his that makes PI feel entirely too attracted to his smug, incredibly rude face. “But when she’s happy, she calls me-”

“Hypnotism! Right, I’m certain that book is till here somewhere!” PI quickly drowns PI out, searching around for the book. It’s not terribly hard to find, though it is placed rather low on the shelf and hidden underneath a few more relevant hardcovers. “There we are; Hypnotism for Advanced Beginners. It’s a through explanation of the entire phenomena really. Contrary to popular belief, you can’t really force people to do things when they’re hypnotized. It’s just a suggestion, and the person who gets the suggestion has to already be inclined towards such an activity-”

“I didn’t ask for a history lesson PI, I just asked you to try that on me.” Sleuth sighs loudly, and PI’s mouth twitches into a frown. There are days when he considers moving out of this building just to get away from him and Ace Dick, except the rent here is very reasonable and he’s settled in, and he would have to advertise the office change in case his clientele didn’t remember, and it would just be ever so much more inconvenient. “Then again, maybe you’re not advanced enough for that. I mean, Ace Dick’s easy to muddle up, but my brain’s much more complex. I can see why it would give you trouble-”

“Excuse me, but I think I know more about this than you do.” PI hrmphs, cracking the book open to the chapter on how to put someone under. The steps are simple enough. “I need you to lie down on the couch.”

“I though you had to swing a pocket watch in front of my face, or one of those dangling gold ball... things.” PS does what he’s told at least, taking his hat off and setting it aside before flopping back on the couch. PI’s frown ticks down one further, annoyed that PS can’t lay down like a normal, responsible human being. “Y’know, so I can stare at that while you do the whole ‘you are getting veeeery sleeeeepy’ bit. That’s what you did with Ace Dick.”

“While that’s certainly one way of focusing someone’s attention, it isn’t entirely necessary. And my pocket watch was broken last week. But I know what I’m doing.” Well. Mostly. At least he has the book. PI clears his throat. “I need you to close your eyes and relax. Make sure your body is in a comfortable position.”

Sleuth shuts his eyes, squirming around until he presumably finds just the right way to lay. “If I get too comfy, I’m going to fall asleep.”

“I want you to focus on your toes.” PI follows the instructions in the book to the letter, carefully talking Sleuth through it. It’s very simple. He simply needs to put PS into a trance using progressive relaxation techniques, which is simply another way of saying relaxing the body one item at a time. He starts with the toes, and the feet, the legs, fingers, hands, arms, torso and neck, slowly moving his way up PS’ body. And though PS is clearly not feeling it for the first few steps, by the time they reach the neck, he looks like he’s in a perfect trance. Still, he pushes it a little further, asking Sleuth to focus on his breathing, until the very last wrinkle and line on Sleuth’s face smooths out completely. You would almost think Sleuth was asleep, except for the fact that he’s not snoring. “Sleuth? Can you hear me?”

There’s a moment, then a quiet reply. “Yes.”

“Good, very good. Okay. We’re going to start now. I want you to listen very careful to everything being said to you, and I want you to take it to heart and to do it as best you can.” PI carefully coaches him.

He winces as he hears the door to Ace Dick’s office slam. Oh that won’t be good... he better make this short so both he and Sleuth can slip out before Ace Dick heads over to spread whatever is making him miserable onto them.

“Now, Sleuth, I want you to feel all the tension running out of your body and just dripping onto the floor. Imagine that it’s melting away like ice on a hot frying pan. But not sizzling. Put sizzling out of your mind entirely and focus on just the water coming off. I mean the tension, focus on the tension coming off.” He checks to see if Sleuth is relaxed, lifting his arm and letting it fall. It seems almost boneless. He smiles, pleased at how well this is going.

Ace Dick seems to be having trouble with whatever hookers he may have recently ordered, and his conversation quickly turns into a yelling match that would normally fill the room. Thankfully, Pickle Inspector had the presence of mind to have sound-proofing installed to prevent every single word of Ace Dick’s often filthy tirades to end up in his office (though his first call went to the entirely wrong organization - what was with the companies in town having utterly misleading advertisements? There was no possible way that had to be good for business).

“You feel relaxed and, well, very relaxed, very calm. Do you? Nod if you do.” PI checks. PS nods. “Good, good. So, now you’re going to learn a word and whenever you hear that word in the future, you’ll feel just like you do right now- well, not asleep of course, awake and alert. Very awake and alert.”

He pauses, collecting himself. Too much of this and the command won’t take. The book made it clear; be very precise, very to the point. “Right. Problem Sleuth, when you hear the word pumpkin, you will feel, relaxed, but alert, and all of your stress and worries will be gone, and you will be ready to-”

“-SUCK MY COCK!” Ace Dick’s mostly muted tirade suddenly amps up for the big finish and finally comes through the walls rather than staying on his own side. PI winces at the sound, fists clenching slightly. He hates sharing a floor with that man.

“-ready to take on the world.” Pi finishes, looking intently at the sleeping Sleuth’s face. He seems fine. “When I say one, you will wake up feeling like you’ve just had a very nice nap. The kind where you wake up easily, not that kind where you feel too warm and kind of sick and tired- anyway, when I say one. Ready? Three... two... one.”

Sleuth’s eyes open, and he looks at PI with a confused look on his face. “So? When are you putting me under?”

“I did. Just now. You just... this is you just waking up.” PI explained. Sleuth looked less than convinced. “Look at the clock if you don’t believe me. A whole ten minutes has passed.”

“Yeah?” He glances over, clearly not sold by actual proof. “How do I know I didn’t just fall asleep?”

“Because you didn’t.” PI resists the urge to cross his arms over his chest. Really, how rude. Like PI would lie about something like this. “You’re the one who came to me and asked me to try hypnotizing you, and I did. I have nothing to gain from lying to you. I don’t appreciate that sort of accusation.”

“Fine, don’t get your undies all in a bunch.” Sleuth sits up, giving a stretch. “So, what’s the word? Because my shoulders are still killing me.”

“Oh, quite simple. Pumpkin.” It’s amazing to watch it work. Sleuth’s shoulders just even out in half a second, and his whole body just seems to get instantly less tense. “Oh, there we are! See, I told you, it works quite nicely doesn’t it?”

“Yeah... really good.” Sleuth sounds a little strange. This must be what he sounds like when he’s relaxed. Odd. “You’ve been a real good pal to do all this for me, Inspector.”

PI nearly glows at the compliment, and at having Sleuth finally call him Inspector. “Thank you Sleuth, I’m quite happy to help you with these sorts of things. While you were out, I was thinking that maybe we could go out for dinner or something similar. There’s that place up the street that I’m quite fond of, that Prospitian one with the little ice dishes.”

“Yeah, sounds great.” Sleuth gets up off the couch, and just as PI is about to follow him, he puts a hand on the Inspector’s chest and pushes him back down into his chair. “But hold up a sec, I’ve got something to do first.”

“Oh, certainly, what is i-mmmffph!” What it is, apparently, is putting his mouth right on PI’s. PI flails, caught quite off guard by the sudden change in attitude and the sudden intrusion of a tongue into his mouth. Sleuth seems quite prepared for PI’s arms, which he deftly catches and holds against the arms of his chair while he continues to kiss Inspector.

It’s not as if PI hasn’t thought about this before. It’s just that this sort of thinking is regulated solely to furtive highly shameful late night intricately detailed masturbatory fantasies, the kind where Sleuth apologizes for being very rude and inconsiderate by doing all sorts of dreadfully fascinating things to the Inspector’s genitals. He often feels quite ashamed of himself afterwards when conscious thoughts return and he’s forced to confront how illogical the whole scenario is, and how rude it is of Pickle Inspector to harbour fantasies about his best friend when they both happen to be in relationships. Though to be fair, PI and NB have an entirely non-sexual relationship where their emotional and intellectual needs are fully met by one another but their sexual urges are not entirely compatible and thus they have politely agreed that the other may feel free to seek sexual gratification outside of their relationship, though to date neither of them has done so because that requires physical contact with strangers and quite frankly, PI’s sex drive is so low and his standards for attraction are so high that the two rarely ever intersect in a meaningful way and it’s much easier to simply deal with those impulses privately and to ignore physical contact with someone like Sleuth, whose status with his girlfriend is muddied and nebulous and seems to change depending on the time of day-

The runaway train is thoughts are on is only derailed when Sleuth sets a hand in PI’s lap and squeezes. PS breaks off the kiss, presumably just to watch PI’s mouth drop open with shock. “Hey, brainy, stop thinking so much. I’m trying to get in your pants over here. It’s not a real compliment when I’ve got my tongue in your mouth and you’ve got your gourd stuck in the clouds.”

“I. Oh. Of course. Yes. Good. I’ll. Yes.” Inspector finds himself unable to string more than two words together. It’s quite difficult to think with the hand resting on his groin, particularly since it is Sleuth’s hand and he is that intersection between PI’s sex drive and his standards for attractiveness. “Carry on. With. The seduction.”

Sleuth gives him a grin, and even if there wasn’t a hand below his waist, he would still certainly feel a stirring in his trousers. He watches a little dumbfounded as Sleuth settles down in front of the Inspector’s chair, unbuckling and unzipping and then tugging down the multiple layers of fabric separating PI from the world at large. He feels rather exposed and a little chilly when his pants and underwear end up around his ankles, and his cock is just sitting there for both of them to see.

“Seduction huh? Why the hell not. That’s as good of a word as any for what I’m doing to you.” Sleuth wraps a hand around Inspector’s cock and strokes it, causing Inspector to make a shocked little sound. He’s not entirely certain that he isn’t dreaming, and so he quickly pinches himself to wake up. After all, it is incredibly highly unlikely that such a thing would come to pass in the real world. He pinches until he’s quiet certain he’ll have a bruise, and yet he is still here, and Problem Sleuth’s hand is stroking PI’s shaft. Sleuth notices and laughs with that charming, disarming chuckle that’s gotten him out of a thousand tight spots. “I’m feeling kind of insulted over here. Most people wouldn’t be so eager to think this was a dream.”

“It’s not that, not at all, I’m quite- um. well.” Pleased isn’t the proper word for how you feel when the man you have a crush on has a hand on your cock. Pleased isn’t the proper word at all. “Well. It’s just. Very uncharacteristic of you.”

“You’ve got no idea what’s characteristic of me when I’m making a point.” Sleuth keeps on stroking Pickle Inspector through the whole thing, which is making it very very hard to think about anything other than ‘oh yes please don’t stop’.

“Yes but, but even so-” He moans, his head falling back against his chair as Sleuth’s thumb runs over the head of PI’s cock. This is simply impossible, and utterly divine. “Sleuth, please, I. I can’t think like this.”

“That’s the point. Shut it off and just enjoy what I’m doing.” Sleuth tugs PI’s hips forward, so he’s closer to the edge. His knees stick out awkwardly on either side of PS, who seems not to notice or care that PI has all the sexual appeal of a scarecrow forgotten in a farmer’s field past harvest. And while PI is simply boggling about this whole situation, Sleuth decides that this is the perfect time to put his mouth on the Inspector’s cock.

“Oh god, oh god!” It feels a little odd to be calling upon, well. Himself. But it’s the first thing that comes to mind when he’s suddenly enveloped in the warm wet mess of Sleuth’s mouth, and even more so when he turns his eyes up to look at PI’s face and gives a short suck that makes him squirm. “That’s- oh that’s- do it again, please.”

Sleuth chuckles, the whole sensation feeling odd and terribly erotic with his mouth still around PI’s cock, and his tongue swipes along the length of the Inspector’s shaft. This is how he discovers that having someone’s mouth on you feels approximately ten times better than a well lubricated hand, in no small part because the mouth is both warm and far more adept at controlling how tight something feels through suction than PI has ever been with tightening his hand.

He sinks deep into the chair, trying very hard not to moan and failing quite miserably at it. Sleuth seems to find the whole thing amusing, his eyes constantly fixed up on Inspector’s face, and his lips curving into a smirk now and then around his cock. In all his fantasies, he never imagined that Sleuth would still looks so spectacularly smug with his lips wrapped around the Inspector’s shaft. It becomes clear that he won’t last very long like this, and so he tries his best to not focus on how hot Sleuth’s mouth is, or the devious look in his eye, or how badly PI just wants to put both hands on his head and push his mouth all the way down-

That is really, really not helping. He fights to slow his breathing down, even as Sleuth backs off and starts sucking particularly hard on just the head of his cock. “Sleuth, stop, stop, stop, you’re going too fast!”

He laughs, pulling off and putting his hand around PI again, stroking him quickly and at such a speed that it makes PI squirm uncomfortably. “You really like missing the point of these things. You get the same prize, no matter if you finish first or last, so stop dragging your feet.” Sleuth swipes his tongue over PI’s head, and PI’s fingers dig into the armchair as he moans. “That’s what I want. Come on, get real loud, I know you want to. Let that asshole next door know you’re getting the best blowjob of your life.”

“What? No! That’s horrible!” PI tries his hardest to scold PS, but he can’t manage to sound properly indignant when PS just keeps darting his tongue out, swirling it around the very, very sensitive flesh in front of him. “I’d rather we- oh god - we didn’t-”

“Don’t get all bent out of shape. He’ll just think you’ve got a hooker in here.” His mouth sinks back down, sucking hard. PI kicks out one foot, hammering it into the ground in a desperate bid to release some of the energy building inside of him. He thinks of horrible things- oh Ace Dick. That works. He feels some of the build-up retreat at the thought of his uncouth neighbour. This is the one time where sound proofing is proving to be inconvenient-

“Wait! Wait, no, stop!” The horrible truth hits PI all at once and he pushes PS off of him. “No! No, you don’t want to do this!”

“Pretty sure I do, or I wouldn’t be on my knees. This isn’t exactly comfortable y’know.” Sleuth’s mouth is all shiny and wet, and the Inspector whines softly just looking at it. He grins, knowing exactly what he’s looking at. Sleuth slowly swipes his tongue along his lower lip and PI has to look away.

“No, no listen, when you were hypnotized, I gave you instructions. And when I was doing that, Ace Dick was yelling on the other side of the wall like he does, because that’s what he always does and he’s so inconsiderate because there are others paying rent in this building and we deserve our peace and quiet - but, but!” He quickly adds as he sees Sleuth about to reach out and touch him again. “But! When I was giving you instructions, he yelled something that... well. It was. It was incredibly vulgar. And I think your mind may have taken it as an instruction, and it wasn’t, not at all, and now you’re only doing this because it was part of the pumpkin keyword- oh blast it all, I said it again-”

“Hold up motormouth, don’t go flapping your chops so quick that they get ahead of your brain.” Sleuth leans against PI’s knees in only the cool and relaxed way that he could possibly manage to do while his mouth is still wet from being f- being fff- having oral intercourse with. “You think you put a suggestion in my brain that’s making me desperately want to inspect your pickle-”

“Oh that’s just dreadful, PS, really.” PI pulls a face at the unnecessary double entendre. Somewhere, deep in the city’s sewer system, Spades Slick’s piano breaks a string and the small man sits there, seething in rage that someone, somewhere in his city, has made a better pun than him. PI and PS carry on, oblivious to Slick’s rage. “There was no call for that.”

“You’re just jealous you can’t do it with my name.” Sleuth reaches out again, and PI bats the hand away quickly before it can touch him. PS just rolls his eyes and carries on. “You said that you can’t make anyone do anything they don’t want to.”

“I. Well. Oh. Yes. That’s...” All true, he remembers. That was a cornerstone of the case he’d solved after all. You can place suggestions in minds, but you simply cannot force a person to do anything they do not want to do, no matter how deep or strongly you emphasize it. People will simply snap themselves out of the trance, or disregard the instructions if it does not match with their personality. Which means that even if Ace Dick’s instruction took... “You... really want to do this...”

“You think I’d get on my knees for anybody who told me when I was sleeping that I should? I don’t think so.” PI is about to remind PS that there’s quite a bit of difference between being in a trance and sleeping, but his attempts to educate are once again thrown to the wind as PS simply settles his mouth around the Inspector’s cock again and gets back to work.

As it turns out, he was quite mistaken when he thought Sleuth was going too fast before. That was a leisurely stroll in the park compared to the second leg. His mouth moves quickly over his cock, sucking as such intensity that Pickle Inspector is quite sure that all of his higher thoughts are being dragged out of him. One hand helplessly latches onto the back of Problem Sleuth’s head, fingers tangling in his slightly shaggy hair. He’s in need of a haircut, and he tries to say as much just to have something to say at all, but all he’s capable of doing is making high guttural sounds.

“C’mon,” Sleuth mumbles around Inspector’s cock. PI boggles as PS unzips his own trousers, and he hears the steady sound of flesh on flesh as he touches himself. PS isn’t just su- isn’t just su- he can think he, he can! He isn’t just sucking PI off, he’s becoming aroused by it too.

“I-i!” It’s all too much. His hips jerk up, pushing deep into Sleuth’s mouth, and the whole world just comes to a halt. PI cries out, his body wrenching from the effort as uncontrollable pleasure spikes through him. His eyes stay at half-lid and he moans as he watches Sleuth try to catch it in his mouth, not entirely succeeding. White dribbles down his cheek, and out of the corner of his mouth, and PI just writhes in his armchair, collapsing into a mess of long, splaying limbs. He manages a weak- “Sleuth!” before lapsing into blissful silence.

Pickle Inspector has just enough energy to watch Sleuth get himself off. He’s very quick about it, not bothering to put on a show. Still though, PI watches and remembers all of this, memorizing the minute changes in PS’ face as he gets close to his own release. He’s a little more composed than PI is, even managing to steal a handkerchief from PI’s pocket (and PI is more than a little annoyed at how terribly rude it is of PS to soil someone else’s handkerchief) to wrap around his cock when he gets near the end. Those brilliant eyes focus on PI, and he’s shocked to the core to see how much want is in them, and directly right at the Inspector. Then Sleuth’s face tightens up like he’s been knifed in the gut and he comes with his own rather loud sound, promptly ruining that handkerchief for all time.

They sit there for quiet some time, both panting loudly and lounging on their respective areas. The phone rings and they both ignore it. It isn’t as if they could answer it anyway, not when it is currently missing the receiver, stolen by either PS or AD sometime yesterday.

PI finally makes a move when he becomes uncomfortably cold. He awkwardly shuffles his underwear and pants up one at a time, before zipping and buckling himself back into place. PS is still lying on the floor, eyes closed and one arm thrown over his face.

“Sleuth?” That gets a reaction, Sleuth’s head craning up a little and his eyes squinting at PI. “That... was... well. It. Um. What I’m trying to say is... that it-”

“Was amazing? I know. You’re welcome.” Sleuth finally pulls himself off the floor, shoving his cock back into his pants and doing them up as well. The handkerchief sadly ends up in a waste bin, but it’s just as well. There’s no way PI would have felt comfortable blowing his nose on it from now on. Sleuth checks the time and stretches out. “Well I feel great. We should get going?”

“What? Why- oh! Oh right.” The restaurant. They’re going to go eat at a restaurant together. Problem Sleuth just- just blew Pickle Inspector, and now they’re going to go eat out. His lips press together in a thin line. “Sleuth-”

“Don’t go there. Don’t make it weird.” He helps PI up, taking a moment to sort him out until he looks presentable. “You’re buying right? Because I’m stone broke right now.”

“Yes, of course. But. We should-” PI barely gets into it before being shushed by PS. “But-”

“We’re friends, right?” He gets a nod from PI. “And sometimes being friends means there’s benefits, right? Like you being the kind of friend who buys dinner for one of his other friends.” PI nods again, following his logic. “See? This was just another benefit. We don’t need to make a big production out of it. All you have to do is say ‘thanks Sleuth, that was great’.”

“... thanks Sleuth, that was great?” He tries out, and Sleuth fixes that hundred-watt smile on PI. “That’s-”

“No.” PS opens the door to the office and steps out into the hall, skidding to a stop when he nearly runs into Ace Dick. “Dick, you asshole!”

“Sleuth, you fucking clown.” He peeks around Sleuth, clearly scoping the office out. “Where are the broads?”

“You missed them, which is good because if they’d gotten one look at you, we would have never been able to talk them into coming back. They already went out through the fire escape so they didn’t have to see your ugly mug.” Sleuth starts into Dick, and Pickle Inspector knows how this ends, and this is not how he wants to spend the rest of his evening.

“I’m sorry Ace Dick but we really must be going. We have an important case to attend to, regarding the disappearance of a society woman’s jewelry, which I believe may have been taken by her husband as punishment for neglecting him, and we need to clear the name of the butler, whom I feel is entirely innocent and has been wrongly accused of the theft-” PI rambles on, watching as Dick’s eyes just glaze over.

“Enough, I don’t care. I’ve got more important shit to do.” He pushes past Problem Sleuth, deliberately knocking him to the ground. PI has to get a hand on PS’ collar before he takes off after Ace Dick, who is clearly heading for the fire escape.

“Fine. Us too. Have fun repulsing every woman you meet.” Sleuth yells after AD, who simply returns his annoyance with a middle finger. “What a charming fellow.”

“He’s still part of Team Sleuth.” PI reminds PS, and they finally get going. “And he’s our friend.”

“Yeah, sure. But good luck convincing me to do anything that benefits that asshole.” They take the stairs, PS tucking his hat onto his head. “Hurry up, gangly, I’m getting hungry.”

PI nearly says something horribly rude and rather nasty before he catches himself. Sleuth is really rubbing off on him, and not in a good way- not in that way either! He huffs silently at his mind for having worked him up into knots, and then pushes it all aside. The Inspector is hungry as well, and he knows this will all be easier to digest over a nice iced desert.


End file.
